Are you the person you want to be?

I thought a bit of discussion could be very interesting and why not bring up something personal?

I am in short, not the person I want to be in real life. This is gonna sound alien to you but, I have a history of actually helping people with their problems. But to the point that they expect me to help them automatically if they ask. This is not what I had intended. Yes I don't mind helping out, but I do so because I want to. Not because you should expect it at the times.

And while I think this, I always say yes. Then I am working out on with whatever task they have, they keep piling up stuff. It is mostly computer stuff, but they also tend to keep on talking to me when I'm trying to figure out what kind of fuck up they have done to the computer and I work best if no one talks to me and expects a reply. (Why the fuck did you choose to install Vista in bloody Indian?)
(Where the fuck are your connection protocols?) (Seriously how the hell do you install Windows without the STANDARD AND OBLIGATORY protocols?)

So I have to keep working on saying god damn no, when I cannot be arsed to. And more like offer up my help if I care enough to help. Or if they atleast god damned payed me.

I am also lazy, but once something is started I see them through. Besides my lazyness is a core part of me and I do not really see any problem in that. Relaxing is important these days with stress and other stuff of diseases poping up everywhere afterall right?

So write away, is there something you wish you were better at? Type away.

I want to be someone who doesnt get walked over and trampled on all the time. Someone that can fix her own emotional problems instead of everyone elses. Someone who can listen to her own advice rather than just give it to others.